Do you often help other people? Do you often help people who have not actually asked for it? Giving unsolicited assistance costs unnecessary energy. You are better off using that on yourself.
Does that mean that you can never help someone again? Of course not! It is good to help each other, to be there for each other, but the art is to do that without lowering your energy. How do you do that?
The 5 most important rules in helping!
1 – Check your own energy level first.
You don’t take good care of yourself when you start helping someone else while your energy is already low. That is bad for your Earth energy and that will eventually cause all kinds of complaints. Of course, there are emergency situations but these are rare. Taking good care of yourself means that you consciously choose: yes, I will help and that costs me this much energy. Can I afford that or not?
2 – Ask yourself what you really want to achieve.
What benefit is there for you when you are helping others? There is almost always a benefit, realize that! Do you want to give ideas? Share your personal experience? Apply your knowledge? Do you want to be liked? Or do you want to please? Do you want appreciation or prestige?
Of course, you have the best in mind for the other, but does the other person ask for help? If not, why do you want to help? What desire of yourself is behind this? And what could you do better to satisfy this desire of yours? Here is a great opportunity for you to work on your personal development, especially if you are helping people all the time …
3 – Get the hints!
You should not “help” people who do not ask for help or do not indicate that they need help (and be honest with yourself). It is wasted energy and you are better off using it for yourself. Moreover, it is often not appreciated. Have you experienced not getting a thank you before?
So get the hints. Frowned eyebrows, crossed arms and more of this rejecting body language says enough. As well as statements like “yes but”, “not right now, this is possible later” or “thanks” after which they walk away. Do yourself and your energy a favor and get the hints. Stop offering to help and save your energy for your own personal development.
4 – What is helping?
Before you get back into your helping mode, ask yourself what helping really is. Do you help the other person by removing his or her problem? By telling the other person exactly how or what should be done? Is that really what that person needs?
I understand that when you have learned something you want to share it with everyone, that you want everyone to experience whatever you have experienced. I used to be like that, but I soon learned that I was not thanked for that. Moreover, I learned that everyone is at a different point in his or her development and that I also had to respect that. Everyone has their own path to walk and not everyone is at the same point as you. Try to see that. So be subtle, it is best to give them an idea, but as soon as you get a hint you are better off to stop and just be there for them, offer a listening ear. Nothing more.
5 –Be the good example
Be the change you want to see in the world. People follow your footsteps rather than your advice, so be an example. Inspire others with this and be ready to help others when they ask for it and only if you choose to!
And who helps you?
Do you ever ask for help? Do you allow others to help you?
How is the balance between helping others, helping yourself and having others help you? Think about that. I would like to see your reaction to this article below the blog!
I hope I have been able to motivate and inspire you again!